Choosing a Slow Start to the New Year
Happy New Year from Blue Chair Counseling! I hope 2026 treats you well. This year, I am so over the hustle and bustle of resolutions and goals. So, I am choosing to start slow as I enter into this new year. Care to join me?
The Pressure to Start Over
The calendar flips to January 1st, and suddenly the message is everywhere: new year, new you. New goals. New routines. New habits. A better version of yourself, preferably by the end of the month.
But if you’re feeling tired instead of motivated, heavy instead of hopeful, or resistant instead of inspired, something important is happening.
Many of the women I work with come into January exhausted from the family chaos of the holidays, drained from traveling, and weighed down by all the sweet treats and late nights. Personally, I was so ready to get back into a routine, cook some real food again, and go to bed at a decent time.
If that’s you too, there is nothing wrong with needing a slow start to the new year.
Winter Is Not the Season for Hustling
We often forget that January exists in the middle of winter. Cold. Dark. Quiet. A season when nature is resting, not blooming, producing, or pushing forward.
And yet, we expect ourselves to do the opposite.
Winter naturally asks for:
More rest
Less stimulation
Slower moving
Shorter to-do lists
More gentleness
If you’ve been pushing through burnout, grief, emotional exhaustion, or people-pleasing patterns all year, your body may be asking for recovery before reinvention.
Rest is not a reward you earn after productivity. It is a biological and emotional need.
Unlearning the Guilt of Rest
For many women, rest comes with guilt. Guilt for slowing down. Guilt for not maximizing potential. Guilt for choosing ease when others seem to be grinding.
This guilt often has roots in:
Being praised for over-functioning
Learning that worth equals productivity
Growing up as the responsible or dependable one
People-pleasing to avoid conflict or disappointment
When those patterns are present, a slow January can feel unsafe and uncomfortable, even when it’s what you need most.
I often remind clients that guilt doesn’t always mean you’re doing something wrong. Sometimes it means you’re doing something new. Unlearning guilt takes time. It starts by noticing the internal voice that says, “You should be doing more,” and responding with compassion instead of compliance.
Reflect: Take a moment to reflect on the voice of guilt that you experience. What is it saying about rest and productivity? What does it feel like in your body? Get curious: what is it trying to do for you? Trying to keep you safe because it is fearful of the consequences? Take a moment to check in with yourself and build some insight into that self-guilt!
Letting Go of Rigid New Year’s Resolutions
Traditional New Year’s resolutions tend to be rigid, all-or-nothing, and rooted in self-criticism. They often sound like:
“I need to fix this about myself.”
“I have to be more disciplined.”
“I need to completely change my life.”
For perfectionistic or people-pleasing nervous systems, this approach usually backfires.
Instead of asking, “What should I force myself to do?” Try asking: “What would feel supportive, nourishing, or even fun this year?”
Fun goals invite curiosity instead of pressure. They allow room for rest, flexibility, and joy.
My intentions this year are rooted in small, simple shifts that I can easily implement into my daily routine and that bring me joy. My list includes:
read more books I enjoy and stop reading ones I don’t
drink tea before bed
wear colorful socks (to bring whimsy to my winter outfits)
lean into more analog activities like sewing, coloring, and cooking
decorate my home with thrifted pieces I love
move my body in ways that feel good
listen to new music
take lots of pictures
share one gratitude every day at dinner
Avoiding People-Pleasing Around New Year Expectations
New Year’s resolutions aren’t just personal, they’re often social. You may feel pressure to:
Join group challenges
Match others’ motivation
Perform growth publicly
Prove you’re improving
If you tend to people-please, January can feel like another performance: showing others you’re trying hard enough.
A slow start to the new year may mean:
Not announcing goals publicly
Declining accountability challenges
Letting your growth be private
Choosing what aligns instead of what impresses
Boundary Reminder: You don’t owe anyone access to your healing process. You are allowed to move at your own pace, even when others are rushing.
Aligning Goals With Your Values Instead of Fear
Values-based intentions feel different than fear-based resolutions.
Fear-based goals sound like:
“I can’t stay like this.”
“I need to fix myself.”
“I’m falling behind.”
Values-based intentions sound like:
“I want more peace.”
“I want to feel more connected.”
“I want to be kinder to myself.”
When goals come from values, they naturally allow for rest, adjustment, and humanity.
Reflection Prompt: Get inspired by the values list below and identify a value that is personal to you! Reflect on how that value informs your intentions for the year. There’s no right answer, just an honest one!
“I value … and so I want to focus on … right now.”
Values: peace, rest, self-compassion, authenticity, safety, connection, presence, boundaries, gentleness, self-trust, simplicity, stability, healing, joy, integrity, creativity, freedom, curiosity, adventure, comfort, nourishment, gratitude, acceptance, forgiveness, honesty, kindness, independence, openness, respect, support, focus, friendliness, expression
You Are Allowed to Begin Softly
You do not need to overhaul your life to be worthy of a new year.
You do not need to hustle your way into healing.
You do not need to prove growth to anyone.
A slow start to the new year can be an act of self-trust, a signal that you’re listening to your body, honoring your limits, and choosing alignment over pressure.
Here’s to a slow start to 2026!
If this resonates and you’d like support navigating rest, boundaries, perfectionism, or people-pleasing patterns, therapy can help you move forward in a way that feels steady, compassionate, and sustainable.
Learn more about therapy with me at bluechaircounselingservices.com or reach out to schedule a consultation!